you are a sex-crazed furry freak! Hoo hoo, you're a horny cat! Are you OK? Here we go! Horny cat, one day I'm gonna get you fixed. Horny cat, I want to get a good night's sleep. Hoo hoo, horny cat! Horny cat, What gets you so turned on like that? Horny cat, Is it the weather that we've got? Hoo, horny cat! Horny cat, why do you strut 'round like that? Horny cat, why must you call like that? Hoo hoo, hoo hoo, Hoo hoo, hoo hoo, Hoo hoo, you're a horny cat! Horny cat, horny cat (fades out).
Warm our laps.
Give us someone to talk to.
Help reduce high blood pressure.
Bring the winter air inside, nestled in their coats.
Create a kindred feeling with other "cat people".
Make us more aware of birds.
Donate their services as alarm clocks.
Display daring acrobatic feats right in front of our eyes.
Contribute to living a longer life.
Make a window sill more beautiful.
Keep mice on the run.
Make us smile.
Inspire poets and playwrights.
Teach us how to land on our feet.
Let us indulge our desires to really spoil someone.
Make our homes warmer.
Remind us that life is mysterious.
Share with us the all-is-well experience of purring.
Instruct us in the luxurious art of stretching.
Show us how to lick our wounds and go on.
Give us cool cartoon characters.
Make even an old worn couch look beautiful.
Open our hearts.
Whiskers tickling your face,
Little wet tongue on your neck.
This is what it sounds like when cats kiss,
Purring noises in your ears,
Meows waking you from your deep sleep.
This is what it looks like when cats kiss,
A cat face really close to yours,
Yellow eyes staring intently.
This is what it is when cats kiss.
I'll just mention what some of my useless powers are. They don't do me any good, I don't know why I even have them.
- I have an innate ability to fix computers, software, and programs (well, that can be useful at times).
- I can sense things. I'm not psychic, but I can sense when something is not right, or is about to happen.
- I can skateboard. This serves no purpose at all, but it does help in looking cool.
- I can communicate with cats. This way, they always talk to me a lot. Even strange cats who don't know me will chat.
- I do complex origami.
- I speak Japanese. This might be good if I ever get lost in Japan, but it's useless in Ottawa.
- I possess the power of the little black duckie. It was stripped from me on Saturday, and it is useless in the wrong hands (I will elaborate later).
These are only a few, there are probably more that I haven't discovered yet.